The Lot

The last two weeks have been rough, honestly life was pretty stressful and full of many ups and downs as we tried to nail down a lot to build our future home on, but the last two weeks can be chalked up as the worst so far in this entire process.

I was completely useless for most of the last two weeks, I tried to go about my normal day and accomplish items on my "to do" list, but it was really hard and my motivation was gone. I would wait most of the day for people to return my calls, hopefully with good news, but usually they were calling with more hoops we would have to jump through to make it happen.

There were moments when I thought we would loose the lot, and a bunch of money we have already invested, and in order to deal with the stress my body and mind seemed to shut down and only do what was necessary.

Part of me is grateful when I deal with stress this way because the alternative ulcer flareup is very painful, but the guilt of my behavior is terrible and I can't help but feel like maybe if I was a little better I would be able to deal with the stress and still be at the top of my game.

In the end it took a week longer than our contract gave us, but we finally signed the papers on Friday and we have a lot to start building on.

I am so grateful to have this part of the process behind us, I can't wait to see the house start to go up, but I know that there will still be many challenges ahead. I only pray I can deal with them a little better than I did these last two weeks.

It is summer break after all and I would love to enjoy it!!